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Episode 99 – Torture of the Torrid Timebomb: The Heatstroke of Ramjack
Uncategorized | | 24. June, 2012

It’s episode 99… Farewell double digits! Jon Pernisek joins us while Alex is off dealing with this years crop of 9/11 year olds. We discuss the awesomeness of Harry Belafonte in the Larger Locks Literary Lounge. We also spend a moment on the insanely horrific and insipid movie, Prometheus. A film that revels in it’s anti-science pro-nonsense message to the point you can almost see the phantom of Kirk Cameron’s hand shoved up Damon Lindeloff’s ass. Dreams and Films are interpreted and Belvedere is visited by a lot of Amish stock footage, and Saved by the Bell has its final dance at the lamest prom ever.

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Newport, KY 41072-1841

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Unless you are Damon Lindeloff.

Listen to Episode 99 – 2:11:51

Episode 98 – Ramjack and the Prophecy of the Mouse-Man Saboteur
Uncategorized | | 14. June, 2012

We’ve been at this for three years, but there’s no time to luxuriate in celebrations as we discuss the shenanigans, tomfooleries, and goings on leading to the 2012 Cincinnati Fringe Festival, confused audiences in search of thereapy, and private command performances. Belvedere fights off rape… again, and Saved by the Bell is Just Bonkers as the Tori Universe gives us yet another themed dance.

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Newport, KY 41072-1841

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You could get a private command performance!

Listen to Episode 98 – 2:08:31

Episode 97 – Arsenic Age Dreams in the Country Kitchen of Ramjack
Uncategorized | | 6. June, 2012

Stop telling jokes and throwing out pickup lines. Pop into your local lending library for a puppy or two and then sit back and hear about the virtues of White-Supremacy from everyone’s favorite deeply literate, funny, and incisive writer ‘Old Derb’ Brad’s Optometrist is going to murder him. Alex hangs out at the worst fucking place on planet Earth. The Mr. Belvedere Valentine’s Day episode is just as awkward and incestuous as you would guess and Saved by The Bell blows our mind with the revelation of the shuttle-bus. We attempt to decipher backlogged voicemail and prep for a birthday-pick-a-palooza

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PO BOX 721841
Newport, KY 41072-1841

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Our Card Catalogue is chock-a-block full of the best new puppies!

Listen to Episode 97 – 2:33:29

Episode 96 – Screams for Hope: The Vacuous Surrender of Ramjack
Uncategorized | | 17. May, 2012

We are back for Episode 96 with all of our deeply literate, funny, and incisive shenanigans. But, of course, we are also maddening, outrageous, cranky, and provocative when we talk about crazy old racists, hologram ghosts, and being a better grandchild that lies about sex. Jon sends us part IV in the epic fanfiction monstrosity of “The Belvedere and the Butterfly”
We clutch or cool chains in the “Larger Locks Literary Lounge” for further discussions on the state of literature and we play Miss Marple at the behest of the Evil Horde!

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PO BOX 721841
Newport, KY 41072-1841

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It’s where all the cohort swarms are free to mingle without judgement!

Listen to Episode 96 – 1:57:03

Episode 95 – Ramjack and the Crisis of the Shadow-Man Mirror-People
Televison»Uncategorized | | 24. April, 2012

Hey remember Easter? We do. Barry-san be praised! We are prepping for Vatican III i.e., No Vatican. Grab a glass of your finest aged urine and mouthful of dirt we’ve got a slew of new addicts and a couple of well placed halibuts. The coffee shops are filled with terrifying weirdos and walking cliches. We test our likelihood to become alcoholics. We’re eating bugs, all of us… and no amount of alcohol or showering can change it.

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We will never force you to eat a sandwich you hate.

Listen to Episode 95 – 2:03:14

Episode 94 – Blizzard Battalion Bloodshed: Ramjack and the Invisible Icemen of Death
Televison | | 7. April, 2012

Back in Action with a warning: Beware the Werewolves… and the dolphins… and any other animal that totes weaponry. South Carolina Republicans somehow lower the bar for common sense. We watch some horrific re-enactments from awful lying liars in the E.R. Netflix plays some wacky shenanigans with Saved by the Bell. The Turks are demanding Cami Secrets for Chess Tournaments. We double down and watch the exciting pair of episodes of Mr. Belvedere and Saved by the Bell known as “The Will” and no one knows how to dress themselves.
We launch an exciting new contest and solve our first Mystery Minute!

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We will keep you safe from the animals.

Listen to Episode 94 – 2:41:17

Episode 93 – Homage to a Swindler: The Autobiography of Ramjack
Uncategorized | | 21. March, 2012

Oh snap! It’s a super special episode for you and other humans! People are sharing shitty secrets and we do not know why. Things get incredibly heated in the Ramjack Larger Locks Literary Lounge™ as we talk about the ineptitude of George Washington and lying bitches that pretend to read books but are clearly incompetent with uselessly fragile egos. Luckily Alirio drops by to cool things down as we discuss his birthday pick “Phantom of the Paradise” and learn all about skylight voyeurism and devil contracts from our pal Birdman Winslow.

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Join us on our lying librarian witch-hunt!

Listen to Episode 93 – 2:29:51

Episode 92 – Grizzly Hunting Gadabouts: Ramjack in the Forest of Chance
FanFiction»Televison | | 11. March, 2012

Grab your breakfast ice cream and join us for an exciting new episode! Old timey seeds are here and they and they don’t understand our generation’s music. Japanese Boyfriends list their greviences and take comfort in Asian Jeezo, despite his fratricide. We meet a slew of the most terrifying new friends when Alex is again forced to play America’s Favorite Game: “Strange Addict OR Smells like a Halibut” Brad drinks the most expensive Starbucks drink ever and Alex explores “The Colony.” Chapter Three of “The Belvedere and the Butterfly” carries us further down the rabbit hole and reunites us with an old friend. We hit upon a very special episode of Mr. Belvedere and learn all about AIDS and the Saved by the Bell Crew rests on their laurels with a Valentine’s Day Clip show.

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Whatever your addiction you are welcome!

Listen to Episode 92 – 2:11:33

Episode 91 – Ramjack and the Cummerbund of Sisyphus
Uncategorized | | 5. March, 2012

In this interactive multi-dimensional episode Alex is a sleep prophet and Brad is a Realist with Realism Powers. We get sleep tips from the national sleep foundation. Suprise! It turns out TSA Agents are up to no good. The Germans are desperate to eat giant Doritos Tacos Buckets of gross… but they will never be allowed. Mad Scientists Present Coma Chickens the tastiest of non-animals. The Most Dangerous Game OR The Most Delicious Game? Paul Maki suggests the worst movie ever devised. Alex’s Birthday pick arrives in the form of gravity defying slushies in Step Up 3D.

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More fun than a plate full of deep-fried coma patients!

Listen to Episode 91 – 2:18:32

Episode 90 – Ramjack and the Torchbearer of the Moon-Men
Uncategorized | | 1. March, 2012

We discuss the psychotic and passive aggressive skylarkings of The Ever-Great Honorable General George Washington of the Noble Continental Army Dragoon Force Five of the North Winds Etc. Etc. Etc… Mr. Belvedere takes an insanely dark turn as Jason Bateman stops by for some sexual harrassment and attempted rape. Saved by the Bell ventures into new frontiers of Science Fiction in which Lisa Turtle is turned into a middle-aged white man due to the ever shifting universe.

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We always address you by your full and proper title!

Listen to Episode 90 – 1:10:52

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