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The Red Snuggie of Ramjack: A Holiday Homecomming – Episode 24
We are beyond sorry that these are arriving to you SO late. I spent a good portion of this past holiday season suffering the infamous Swine Flu, supported by bronchitis and two inner ear infections. Yikes! But… I’VE SURVIVED. Adequate excuse? You tell me. 😉
With that said… Mail an Octopus for the new year, The Final Martha Stewart promises, an Oraganic Xmas = revolting, Walmart Drive Though, The happiest place doesn’t know any better, Gray-haired tweens are disturbing the natural order of everything, Hey Internet bitches… let me have my spring roll in peace, Star Wars Holiday Special presents Wookie Porn and Maude: The Next Generation.
Episode 25 and 26 to follow soon. In the mean time, keep checking those score cards! Slip-Trip Hazards are like a thief in the night: you know not the hour!
Ramjack’s Sweater: A Tale of America – Episode 23
Situation Room | teamramjack | 20. December, 2009
Hey you lazy fucking faux-cripple-scooter-bitch-people stop trying to see through your brain bones, because there’s a 20 watt fountains in our brain that can’t die, thus proving the axiom time minus time equals no time…and that’s what I’ve got for you. NO TIME.
Episode 23 has more tips from martha, our plan to protect the Postal Service, Sarah Palin Kettlecorn’s the native americans, Ellen Page is constantly confounded by technology and the people that understand it better than she ever will, and the Situation room leads to more fams getting turned into dinos.
Carbon Monoxide Fury a Cautionary Tale of Ramjack – Episode 22
The Macy’s Pride/Christmas/White man oppressing Native Americans Parade, Martha Stewart bitchslap’s Sarah Palin, Carly Simon apparently didn’t die in 1929, Alex extols the virtues of “cooking” pre-cooked food out of plastic bags, we talk about some wild and wacky commercials from 1989, watch Garfield Thanksgiving & Christmas, Muppet Family Christmas, Jingle All The Way, and Return to Sleepaway Camp (to clear the palate).
And the cruel hand of fate falls harshly on Rex & Rita Readasaurus.
Turkey Chasin’ Hijinx a Ramjack Family Festival – Episode 21
Situation Room | Alexander Green | 22. November, 2009
Finders Keepers, Losers Weepers…it’s a lucky 21 Thanksgiving super spectacular! Martha Stewart News, Alex curls up with his Hagen-daz and bunny slippers to give us a “Gossip Girl” and “90210” update, Brad Discovers “Sell This House” and learns what love is. Thanksgiving fun facts: Suprise! Pilgrims are corn stealing bastards. Plus the Christmas Creep continues his conquest of the calendar.
High Flying Ramjack: An Adventure Story in the Air – Episode 20
Blockbuster is banking on magic to save them, sadly magic is out. Peter Cottontail has a cock on his back… a cock for science! A deranged Martha Stewart becomes our Celebrity Project Child of the month. Brad watches Inglorious Bastards and Venture Bros. And Alex watches his lady shows Gossip Girl and 90210. And who’s conning who in the 1990 Dana Carvey masterpiece Opportunity Knocks. Beware the Christmas Creep Bitches. The Podcast is free for the listening, try my product PLEASE!
Entering Madness: The Catacombs of Ramjack – Episode 19
Situation Room | Alexander Green | 8. November, 2009
Lion OR Lying. Willie Ames is back in charge and he’s going to zap your Roth IRA, An IMDB message board dramatic reading. Shows: Tswift on Snl, Parking Wars and more. Spacial reasoning for dummies, and a tasty haze of vicodin and muscle relaxers gently guide us into the situation room…. where nothing will ever be the same. what would you do?
Spookhouse Spectre: The Crypt of Ramjack – Episode 18
Episode 18 is here and it’s legal! Time to rock the vote. We finish our October Halloween extravaganza, receive a special poem, check in on Taylor Swift, discuss Halloween safety for you, your costumes, and your yard haunt… and who doesn’t love an old fashioned yard haunt? We watch Garfield’s Halloween adventure, run into a Situation Room of Horrors & take a scary “ride on the internet” …as opposed to the cyber-web-net-space. Don’t forget to check your scorecard and your base system. Candy, Candy, Candy!
Jack O’ Lantern Rampage: The Laughter of Ramjack – Episode 17
It’s Spooktacular! Taylor Swift: Globe Trotter, Freemdom Stars: make your own! Spiders want to destroy our economy, Hey Kristen Stewart take a bath and shut the fuck up, Rush Limbaugh shutdown, Old people call phone sex line: Viva Viagra indeed, Oregon Trail becomes reality, a reality Karen Armstrong has no grasp of. We deal with our deep childhood fear of aliens and watch Ernest Scared Stupid now with 175% more trolls than your average Troll Movie.
Pretty Pretty Princess and the Unicorn Tea Party: A Ramjack Adventure – Episode 16
The pretty pretty princess has landed… and nothing will ever be the same.
It’s the Ramjack Super Sweet Sixteen so of course we have Miley and Taylor Swift updates, circumcisions, scaring and AIDS: What you need to know. Watch out for evil Alex from the future because he’s out, about, and here to party. Body language experts are one step from being Sylvia Brown, Deal breakers 101. We watch Creepshow and learn more about the great tradition of writers turned old prospectors. Visit an epic Halloween Situation Room and Brad relates the epic stripper roadtrip adventure of 2009. Let the zombies eat cake!
Obsidian Glory: The Spawn of Ramjack – Episode 15
Episode 15 of our world famous chicken-fried-chicken-podcast-steak-chicken-chicken-cast, We get into the Halloween spirit, present a dramatic reading of Charlie Sheen’s Presidential fan-fiction, learn about France’s plan to get us using MS Paint, and watch the Rock’n’Roll Nightmare experience featuring THE Jon Mikl Thor. Reba has a painstone in her heart box for our girl T-Swift. And we do some live missed connections. Episode 15… more fun than fucking the devil!