The pretty pretty princess has landed… and nothing will ever be the same.
It’s the Ramjack Super Sweet Sixteen so of course we have Miley and Taylor Swift updates, circumcisions, scaring and AIDS: What you need to know. Watch out for evil Alex from the future because he’s out, about, and here to party. Body language experts are one step from being Sylvia Brown, Deal breakers 101. We watch Creepshow and learn more about the great tradition of writers turned old prospectors. Visit an epic Halloween Situation Room and Brad relates the epic stripper roadtrip adventure of 2009. Let the zombies eat cake!
Episode 15 of our world famous chicken-fried-chicken-podcast-steak-chicken-chicken-cast, We get into the Halloween spirit, present a dramatic reading of Charlie Sheen’s Presidential fan-fiction, learn about France’s plan to get us using MS Paint, and watch the Rock’n’Roll Nightmare experience featuring THE Jon Mikl Thor. Reba has a painstone in her heart box for our girl T-Swift. And we do some live missed connections. Episode 15… more fun than fucking the devil!
Taylor Swift update, Suprise! TN is a rancid cesspool of racial intolerance and bigotry… you didn’t know? Glen Beck = douchebag, Chris Hansen needs to make a trip to France, Hoarders update, Survivor-It’s still on air? We wake up in the situation room of the future… and are boggled by the three seashells in 1993’s Demolition Man, starring Sylvester Stallone, Wesley Snipes and Sandra Bullock (in her finest role).
5&2 drive-through, Science gives Mice hoverboards, HOARDERS: the lastest and greatest sensation of the Nation, CSI+ Spy Kids + Baby Jeezo = Hangman’s Curse featuring a young Leighton Meester… You know, from Gossip Girl? No, not the blonde. The other one. Also Taylor Swift needs our help. We fall down a ventilation shaft into the Situation Room and ask Hayrides… Why?
Despite Technical difficulties we bring you an exciting episode 12. Your iPhone tells you when to go to the bathroom, Clowns and Gorillas unite for crime, look-alike sperm for sale, BJ’s for Babies, Peach is the new Pink, Grape is the new Grape, and Bread is the new Trojan. We learn about Toots while Howard the Duck teaches us that Bestiality is ok.
Stay Alert and Check your Score Cards on this very special episode of Ramjack as we slow things down a bit and take it easy. Teenwolf: The Next Generation = van surf or bust. EXTRAORDINARY Chickens! We examine the Campaign shenanigans of ’01 in prep for the county clerks race, Alex makes a visit to J-town, Summer Movies 2009, and we hear the outrage of the public in regards to last episodes situation room debacle.
Don’t forget to grab your very own Official Ramjack Safety Score Card – Wow I feel adequately safe already!
Please note: this story is written in the style of Internet fan fiction and should not reflect on it’s author(s) credibility, intelligence, and/or understanding of the English language, syntax, and basic tenants of human communication.
Force Captain Gomez was a powerful leader women wanted to be with him and men wanted to be him. He wore his uniform sweater with an august congeniality that bellied his brilliant tactical skill and ruthless cunning. The fact that he had been kidnapped by such a cruel and vile being as The Great Magnate of Evil was a sullied stain on the sportscoat of superior righteousness. Luckily the past few months had taught Brad and the alliance members many things about circumventing The Great Magnate of Evil’s security.
“Clearly we can detect a build up of non-specified generic ‘energy’… in fact I’m reading a class five!” Larghhj noted.
“If only we could communicate with Force-Captain Gomez.” grieved Sharnu
“Alex, why don’t you use your fax machine?” Brad inquired
It’s big 10! double digits = double awesome. The light at the end of the tunnel is just duck tape, Japanese Robot pants, Connecticut Update: 5&2 with a 2×4, The Nutmeg state launches war on furries again, Troll 2 teaches us that titles often mean nothing (hint: don’t expect Trolls in this film) and the most inane situation room question ever.
Cows attacks, Germans seek a sneaky glance, Vatican douchebaggery, Super-Ants are here and they wants all ur elektricity Speed Racer is GO! Christina Ricci is HOT! Not to mention a Sprightly Sojourn into the Situation Room.
Please note: this story is written in the style of Internet fan fiction and should not reflect on it’s author(s) credibility, intelligence, and/or understanding of the English language, syntax, and basic tenants of human communication.
You are probably all too well aware of the many theories about parallel realities and quantum gateways. These topics are favorites of Scientists, Sci-Fi Writers, and fans of both. But, if I were to tell you the reality of such things… you would not be able to believe it. Nor would you want to.
“Can I take your order please?” said the frighteningly underage girl at the coffee shop.
Brad took a moment to think before finally settling on an elaborate coffee drink.
After responding to a dozen or so emails from fans, producers, and would be directors, he stopped to take a life affirming deep breath. It was at this moment in which he became aware of a strange buzzing noise it seemed to emanate from a door at the end of the shop… a door that he had never seen before.